Two Dawns Today

I do enjoy the dawn of a new day, particularly a bright one. Today we had a rather nice dawn this morning. This afternoon darkness descended with ominous threats of severe weather. It literally became nearly as dark as night. The continuous rumbling of thunder far away caused one to think that we actually might have a storm. There were some wind gusts, tornado warnings, ping-pong ball sized hail warnings. The music station to which I listen is Minnesota Public Radio and there were so many interruptions for weather reports that I just ceased to listen. ¶ We had some rain and some wind and now the sun shineth once more. As “they” say in South Dakota, if you don’t like the weather wait a few minutes. It is true.

¶ I’d never considered myself a writer. I’ve taught children to write, not handwriting, but writing. I guess I’ve written most of my life. After nearly 38 years as a priest I’ve written two or three sermons. When I’ve traveled and throughout the two years of this cancer pilgrimage I’ve written every week. When I stop to think about it, I guess I am a writer. What I’ve not done, for myself, is to actually think about how writing reveals our true nature. ¶ This past week, one of Henri Nouwen’s meditations dealt with this very thing. I’ll share it with you. ¶ “Writing Reveals What is Alive in Us ¶ Writing is a process in which we discover what lives in us. The writing itself reveals to us what is alive in us. The deepest satisfaction of writing is precisely that it opens up new spaces within us of which we were not aware before we started to write. To write is to embark on a journey whose final destination we do not know. Thus, writing requires a real act of trust. We have to say to ourselves: “I do not yet know what I carry in my heart, but I trust that it will emerge as I write.” Writing is like giving away the few loaves and fishes one has, trusting that they will multiply in the giving. Once we dare to “give away” on paper the few thoughts that come to us, we start discovering how much is hidden underneath these thoughts and gradually come in touch with our own riches.” ¶ This week has been very nice. I’ve had time to share with friends, some of whom I’ve not seen in a long time. I’ve felt well, have kept up my exercise schedule, and succeeded my goals most days. ¶ My friend planted some moss roses in the front garden. They looked rather sad as very little plants amongst the stones. Bloom they did, sending forth lovely orange flowers. One of many things that exceed our expectations. One of many things that give us joy.

¶ Cats do sleep a lot. Some experts say up to 20 hours per day. Sophia takes her “big” nap in the afternoon. The rest of the day she enjoys “cat naps.” In the afternoon she chooses not to be disturbed. Her chosen place for her “big” nap is on top of the cabinets in the basement. It’s cool down there and, unless you know she’s there, she becomes pretty much invisible. That’s the way she likes it. ¶ If I’ve been away, she often retires to the basement because she’s bored. When she hears the garage door she heads for the top of the stairs. This is just a show so that I will believe that she has longingly waited for me to return, and please scratch my head. It’s a game and I play it with her. ¶ I hope you have a wonderful week. Thanks for your emails, cards, prayers and thoughts. Thank you for all those things you do for others.

On Thankfulness

As I was on my walk today with the blog in the back of my mind, I pondered the beauty of this day and how very grateful I am to be alive to enjoy it. It has been a wonderful day weather-wise. The high temp was expected to be 75º. I don’t think that was ever reached. The sun has been shining and there has been a slight breeze. All the windows and doors in the house have been open and the wonderful fresh air has wafted through the place. The air conditioner has not switched on all day, and its the 21st of August.!

¶ As I walked along I thought about how thankful I should be that I live in a safe neighborhood, that I have sidewalks upon which to walk, that there are neighbors along the way with whom to stop and chat and that I am healthy enough to take the walk. ¶ I also thought about all the times that I have been less than thankful. I have been given so many opportunities, so many friends, so many experiences, kind and caring parents, a lovely home, everything I need to lead a very good life. I need to learn to live more thankfully. ¶ In the Prayers of the People in the Episcopal Church there is often a place for the congregation to add their thanksgivings. Too often this space is a totally silent time. We always have a lot of things for which to pray. There are those who are dear to us who are sick. We desperately pray for their healing. There are concerns about relationships, often revealed to us with the request that we pray for the people involved. There are our own perceived needs. All of these we willingly poor out. When it comes to those things for which we are thankful, silence.

¶ This last week was chemo week. It is something that I really do not anticipate with great joy. I think the reason is that it encroaches on my time. I must show up at the Cancer Center. I complain that the pharmacy is slow, if they are. I neglect to be grateful when the pharmacy is fast. Every person on the staff does their best to ensure that I am comfortable. The chemo keeps the cancer at bay so that I can lead a normal life. How often do I give thanks for the medicine, those who administer it, and those who invented it? The answer, unfortunately is seldom. For that I am ashamed. ¶ I need to concentrate on leading a thankful life. I need to look upon the things I can do and that I am asked to do with thankfulness that I am able to do those things. Instead of complaining about encroachments on my time, I need to be thankful that I have the time to do what I am asked.

¶ The week went well with no side effects. A little work has been done in the garden but no planting as yet. It’s a bit early to think about planting bulbs. There are so many beautiful choices it’s difficult to narrow them down. Soon I’ll say to myself, just do it! Plants are forgiving. If you don’t like what you’ve done, do it over. Just be thankful that you can! ¶ I am amazed each year when I cut back things in the spring and there is this one green leaf. By August, that green leaf has grown into this gigantic bush covered with little blue flowers and bees and butterflies. It is a miracle. ¶ Thanks for checking in and reading. Thanks for your prayers and thoughts. I am grateful for what you have done for others and for me.

I Don’t Believe It!

Last week I wrote the the landscapers promised to show up this week. They actually did! Tuesday morning bright and early the roar of two trucks was heard. The workers jumped out eager to begin the task at hand. After a conference with the supervisor they went right to work.

¶ The sod is gone, some tired evergreens have disappeared, the “nearly wild” roses were uprooted, new roses planted, some grasses along the east side have found a home, and a new tree installed. It just took a day. Well, almost, since the tree had to be located and collected and a proper hole dug, but it was installed the next morning as promised. ¶ The whole thing looks very nice. There is an area in the center designed for me to add perennials of my choice. That’s was the design on the other side as well, years ago. I’ll still have to mow a strip along the east side, but I can do that. Now plans must be made for the planting. Currently some of the plants are sitting in pots awaiting the master plan, if there is one, and the ambition to plant them. ¶ The west side of the front garden is lush and green with some color from the amaryllis and the petunias. The bush clematis is about to bloom which will create a carpet of blue.

¶ The current outrage in the state of South Dakota is the state Board of Education’s plan to drop several items from the curriculum concerning Native American culture and history. I know that my -elementary education concerning the state began with the arrival of the white settlers. I don’t recall the Native American heritage of the state being brought up in school until I was in college. I truly believe my education was poorer for not being exposed to the rich culture that existed here before my relatives arrived. I am thankful for Native American friends who have helped me to understand and appreciate their culture. I am grieved that current students may be kept in the dark as I was if the current plan is approved. I am not sure what the Board of Education is trying to do with their proposal. It seems to me that it will only encourage the rampant racism already present and all too obvious in this state. ¶ The fruits of misinformation are hitting us in the face. The COVID-19 numbers which were going down are now rising rapidly. The reason is the Delta variant and the refusal by many to be vaccinated. The whole business about masks is too silly to even deserve a comment. It is tragic that children will have to suffer because of the stubbornness of their parents and some elected officials.

¶ My time at the console is nearly complete. I’ve sat there every day this week. Tomorrow will be the last service for a while. I do enjoy the challenge. It is rewarding to reap the fruits of practice. Beginning to learn a new piece of music may be difficult. Actually hearing that composition after some hard work is rewarding. I am grateful for the opportunity. ¶ The week has gone very well and time has flown. Monday begins another week of chemotherapy. I am confident that the time will go by without incident. The staff at the Cancer Center is wonderful. I look forward to seeing them again. ¶ Thank you for reading. Thanks for the prayers and thoughts and encouragement. Thank you for helping others.

I Wonder

The older I get the more I wonder about certain things. I’m selective about that which I wonder. I’m not capable of wondering about everything. That leaves some things for others to wonder about! ¶ I wonder how Sophia cat can be comfortable sleeping with her body pointed in three different directions at the same time. The head faces one way, the front part of the body faces another, and the hindquarters and tail face yet a third direction. If I even tried to get in such a position the paramedics would have to come to my rescue.

¶ I wonder why so many people on motorcycles travel to Sturgis for the annual event there in the midst of a pandemic. I know this is an annual thing. I know that the attendees like to come to South Dakota because we have no helmet law. I know we will never have such a law because that would the be death knell for the rally. The rally is currently underway and people are not only helmet-less but mask-less. Last years event was deemed a “super spreader.” This year we have the Delta variant which spreads more easily. The governor of South Dakota says we have freedoms here because she trusts us to make our own decisions about our health. I wonder. ¶ I wonder how the aforementioned governor feels about her new aircraft. She so desperately wanted a jet and she got a prop instead. It was reported that her previous plane needed replacement, and this is according to the Argus Leader, it had ash trays and the overhead panels containing the oxygen masks would sometimes open if bumped. Both of these flaws justified the expenditure of $5 million plus. I wonder.

¶ I wonder about the amaryllis. They literally appear overnight. I don’t recall seeing anything of them yesterday. Today the front garden has tall amaryllis ready to bloom. You might remember that I’ve mentioned them before. In the spring there are leaves resembling those of day lilies. They turn brown and I cut them off. Now, months later, these tall stems appear with lily-like flowers atop each of them. It’s always a nice surprise. ¶ Sweet potato vines are another surprise. They flourish and I enjoy their lush foliage. Then, one day and totally unexpected a blossom or two will appear. That is also a nice surprise. ¶ I wonder when the landscapers will finally appear. This past week the utility marking companies came and left. A phone call on Friday brought news that the weather, sick crew, wounded foreman (choose one of these options) prevented the arrival of the actual workers. They will surely arrive next week according to the “master” plan. This plan, by the way, only exists in the imagination of the one who speaks about all the excuses.

¶ Several hours have been spent at the console in preparation for the Sunday services. And now, even more time will be spent preparing for a funeral on Tuesday. Hopefully, there will be only one, funeral that is, before the return of the “real” organist. It is good discipline. This causes me to practice rather than just think about practicing. I am very good about just thinking about it until “push comes to shove!” ¶ Weeding in the garden is my other major occupation of late. I also achieved a sunburn on my bald head due to failure to wear a head covering. Hopefully, I’ve learned to cover my noggin when outside. I wonder. ¶ I’ve felt very well all week with enough energy to do the things I should. My daily walks help keep up my energy level, I tell myself. Self-convincing seems to work. ¶ Now I’m off to conduct another building tour of the Pavilion for a reunion group. ¶ Thank you for your constant concern, your prayers and thoughts, and for all you do for others and for me.