What Should I Do?

I just returned from one of my walks. The sun came out for a few brief moments. This is, you understand, one of the very few moments the sun has poked through the clouds in a week’s time. We don’t really have any rain, so clouds are just there not bestowing any blessing on the earth. All they really do is make everything look downcast and dreary. I’m tired of it and it certainly doesn’t do my attitude any favors.

¶ I thought I should take advantage of the few rays of sunshine so out I went out to walk. There are several rental properties west of my house (well east of it also, to be honest about it). I usually walk west because the inclines are less steep. Coming back homewards, I noticed some spray paint on one of the lawns. It was most of a swastika with one numeral 8. I think it is a Black family’s home that adjoins the lawn. I looked up the sign. The swastika everyone is familiar with. The numeral 8 could have been the beginning of 88, which stands for Heil, Hitler, H being the 8th letter in the German alphabet. I believe that this house is the same one that displayed a “Black Lives Matter” sign briefly last June. ¶ I truly hope that this paint job is just some kids playing, not knowing what it means. Then, again, I truly hope that some hate group has not moved into the neighborhood. According to the Southern Poverty Law Center there is only one hate group active in South Dakota, the Neo-Nazis, and they are located in the Rapid City area. They are also present south of us in Nebraska. No other hate groups have been organized in this state according the SPLC’s research. ¶ Anyway, I am wondering if I should report this, and to whom I should report it. I’ve no idea who did it. It is not complete so I am making some assumptions. I’ll need to do some further research. In the meantime I will fret and stew about it. Sometimes just taking a walk will raise a myriad of questions.

¶ I finally got my body outside to do a very little yard work today. Cutting down the canes on the Autumn Joy sedum was about all I could accomplish. I’ve not done much exercise this week because I’ve not felt particularly well. It was chemo week so that could have been the problem. The gray skies day after day could have been the problem. What ever the cause, it felt good to be outside with growing things. A friend came over to help with some weeding. She misses having a garden so I let her “play in my dirt.” ¶ We have a plan to do some more landscaping in the front. In my mind that means taking out grass and putting in something. In my mind something, meaning anything, is more interesting than grass. Also, it does not involve mowing or fertilizing or constant watering. I’ll contact the landscape people the first of the week and see what their vision might be. I’ll listen to their opinion but will, more than likely, prefer my own idea. That’s just the way it is. I am way too old to change!

¶ This week also brought news of the death of another long-time and dear friend. I’m really getting a tired of this. As the alumni news arrived today from my Alma Mater, the thought of reading the class news almost brings a feeling of dread. Let’s face it, there are no births, weddings, weddings of children, new jobs or other happy events to report concerning people from my class. There are only deaths. ¶ As I mentioned I have not felt particularly well this week. Usually the chemo has minimal side effects. I’ve had more nausea this week than every before, and this feeling of being tired almost all the time is not normal for me. I’m hoping next week will be better. ¶ A friend and I will drive to Omaha on Thursday (when it is supposed to be sunny) to visit the botanical gardens there and walk through the field of 350,000 daffodils. It is a beautiful place and it will be lovely to visit again. I’m sure it will perk me up. ¶ I see the radiation oncologist (AKA Erik the Red) on Monday. I don’t know what he is going to tell me since I’ve not had a scan and I look pretty much normal when viewing my countenance in a mirror. I understand from what the regular oncologist said that he will be ordering my MRIs from now on. That will add another circle of medics to my orbit. I’m well cared for. ¶ Thanks for your prayers, your thoughts, your reading, and for keeping in touch. All are needed and received as a blessing.